Here we go again… diving headfirst into an unknown element of healthcare, studying for a certification exam, reaching for what’s possible in my community. I love raising daughters who get it.
Our family lost an aunt last week. She lived a good life, but not nearly long enough, and one marked and ended by cancer.
This was a first of sorts, both for my kids and for my life in Alaska. I felt a significant and sacred obligation to support our family, near and far, and to make space for our children to acknowledge a loved one’s passing.
The night we learned of the death, we turned off all of the lights and stepped outside with candles, each lighting theirs off of another’s. We asked aloud for comfort and peace for family left behind, and whispered thanks for a sweet life of memories we get to keep for our remaining years.
And as we have done so many times in the days since we moved, we turned to a faith not our own, a faith unfamiliar and familiar all the same, a faith that has sustained families through good times and hard for millennia. We borrowed the Jewish prayer of the Kaddish, a prayer that is reportedly only uttered in gathered groups, so as to share grief in the context of supportive community. How beautiful.
Rest easy, Aunt Brenda.
One of the many amazing things about having twins is the obvious, mysterious, unexplainable connection ours share. We call it their twintuition, a phrase they only enjoy when they’re getting along. I stopped taking notes years ago, but I’d like to start again. Sneezing at the same time in different parts of the house is only the beginning.
This week alone, they…
Lost a tooth in the exact same spot.
Received the same score, multiple times on multiple nights, during our new favorite family game.
Leaned into me, wedged between them during church, to whisper the same feedback on a song at the same time.
It’s a magical world with these two.
Perfectly content to be the gal perpetually on the quest for the perfect red lipstick, despite the reality that she wears it only rarely.
While there has never been a local mask ordinance where I live, the grocery stores have very clear signs posted out front, indicating that masks are required to shop. Nearly every time I’ve shopped for food over the last two years, I have seen someone from my church unmasked. One was even wearing a hoodie with our church’s name and logo on it. I feel a little gross writing about it here, so many months later, unable to say I made peace with it or even addressed it with people.
I’m still new here. I’ve only known pandemic life here. For many at my church, my work at the hospital represents an agenda that feels scary and threatening. I am not sure how to form deep, meaningful relationships with Christians here fast enough to earn the relational equity required to run into someone at the grocery store and say, “Hey, friend. I notice you don’t wear a mask, at church or anywhere else. But they’re required here at this store. Did you know we are down 60 staff at the hospital this week? Please, follow this grocery store’s simple request for the sake of your community. I know you probably think you don’t need one or you hate wearing one and faith over fear and all of that… but my actual skin is breaking down from being in an N95 ten hours a day and I have faith that you can cover your nose and mouth for a grocery trip or an hour of worship. Please.”
Forget vaccines. Don’t worry – I don’t want to talk about those, either. But I do not understand folks who claim Jesus and won’t wear a mask, when asked, during a pandemic. I will continue to love them and serve them and worship alongside them, but I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to the make the connection between following Jesus and refusing to follow a local business ordinance.
The science has never promised that wearing a mask will keep me safe from disease, but that masks keep me from hurting others. This has been proven time and time again, an argument only strengthened as we drag on through a second winter with record low cases of flu, head colds, and stomach viruses. Who wants to bring those bugs back? Not me.
I cannot find evidence in Scripture for defying a public health mandate, ordinance, or even small business rule. I don’t see a single example of Christians maintaining control or influence of a region. In fact, the first church was underground, in the era of Roman empire. I see both Jesus and Paul reminding Christians over and over again that this world is not our permanent home and we are to live in it as harmoniously as possible. This video both did and did not surprise me, as hundreds of CPAC attendees cheered for personal liberties and property rights, and then booed when asked to don a mask out of respect for personal liberties and property rights. Imagine Jesus getting halfway through the beatitudes in Matthew 5, and the crowd boos as he tells them to go an extra mile when compelled to walk one. Who knows? Maybe it happened. Jesus’ words were often received as scandalous and nonsensical.
I wrote most of this a year ago and unfortunately, it still holds true. I’m not as angry or shocked as I once was, but I still regularly find myself disappointed and confused. It’s getting harder and harder to recognize the Jesus of the gospels in the Christians of America.
I have found no better answer for a long day than a long night’s sleep. A fully belly on the way to hibernation helps, too.
36 today. Looking forward.