five and flying

I don’t mind gushing about the newest baby, because it hasn’t always been this easy. I try hard to be transparent when I write, but that must include the good stuff too. I’ve never been this at peace with a newborn. I’ve never felt so alive as a mother. We’re nearly five months in and still pinching ourselves daily. Is this real life? Hadassah Lee is a game-changer. This girl is absolutely unbelievable, and her entire world is in love with her.

I can’t tell if she’s sleeping through the night yet because she spends a good chunk of it in my arms. I crave her warmth and scent tucked under my chin at night. When she’s not sleeping or eating, she’s smiling. It feels good to hear people compliment those cheeks. Never in my life have I had a baby on the growth chart. It’s also strange to have a baby who’s hitting milestones on-track, and even early. This week, Haddie started pushing up on all fours and rolling to her tummy from her back. Slow down, baby! She’s a dead ringer for Chris’ baby pictures, so I have a baby girl who looks just like her daddy. I love that.

Recently, I overheard one of the big boys talking to Hadassah Lee as he held her, “Look at those pretty blue eyes! There’s so much world to see!” She tracks her brothers like a hawk when they’re in the room, and her face lights up when anyone smiles at her. The little ones ask to see “Baby Dassah” as soon as they wake up. Nobody minds her squawking through our meals. She’s already fitting into some of the girls’ old outfits, and I can catch little glimpses of the memories they’ll all make in their bedroom someday.

The days and weeks are flying, and there’s nothing I can do to slow them down. I finally understand what it means to live those bittersweet moments with a new baby. I’m sad to watch them pass, but oh so grateful that I get to experience them.