2022

February 19, 2022

After being away from Instagram for nearly a year, I can confirm a quiet rage still rumbles when I learn of racist violence near and far. I can confirm I’m still just as flabbergasted by a religious group, of which I’m supposed to be a part, that continues to oppose science and sound guidance, and so therefore drag my life as a medical professional beyond exhaustion and to the brink of burnout. I can confirm I still desire to scroll, scroll, scroll, and spend money.

I can also confirm that the only times I’ve cried on the floor were measured against real-life circumstances and not the opinions or behaviors of strangers online. I can confirm that most days, I wake up hopeful and fall asleep at peace. I can confirm that collaboration and influence has still been offered to me, and that my skills and gifts are put to use each day. I can confirm I made the right decision and have no regrets.

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2022

February 18, 2022

[Parts of a post that never published, somewhere in the fall of 2020…]

As someone who doesn’t necessarily consider herself to be an artistic visionary (hello, nice to meet you, I’m a nursing-school-grad-following-fashion-design-drop-out), I find it helpful to learn and glean from others’ creativity. I enjoy building on beauty that has already been started. After all, isn’t that what we’re all doing anyway? Ecclesiastes reminds me that there is nothing new under the sun. John Mark Comer tells me that part of being human is to figure out new ways to rework the matter created in Genesis 1. My family enjoys a good laugh whenever I try to draw, but I felt so encouraged after reading Garden City. From carpentry to music to parenting, we simply put our minds and our hands to what is, and we try to make it better. Our own imago Dei stamps are what bring glory to God and goodness to others.

And so I spend a lot of my time online finding inspiration and creative direction for life – ways to make my home cozier, parenting wisdom, what old things are coming back in the world of fashion, healthy-but-gorgeous things to eat and drink. After all, most of life’s mundane maintenance matters greatly to me. I consider my choices, down to the food I put in my body and the clothes I wear, to be both worship and warfare. I would much rather look at things online that are pure and lovely than get lost in a toxic comment thread about politics. Peeking into people’s lives is not the problem. It’s one of the reasons I love the internet. The problem is the how much, the why, and the what next.

I knew it was time for a break when I found myself teaching my daughter to soak cotton balls in lavender oil to keep the moths away from my sweater collection. As I tucked the cotton back into the dark corners of the closet shelves, it hit me. I’m literally acting out Matthew 6, and I’m on the wrong side of it. I’m laying up for myself treasure on earth, and moths will most definitely destroy it.

There are the obvious reasons to take an internet leave of absence (rough year for the entire world, cross-country move, breaks are healthy). There are also obvious reasons for the scrolling and purchasing (new house in new climate, new life in general, again… rough year for the entire world). I’ve taken social media breaks before, and they’ve always been good for me. I usually delete my apps a couple of days per week, and I’ve enjoyed as much as an entire summer off in years past. I feel more awake and grounded afterward, and I look forward to that again. But this time, I’m taking a social media break for a different reason. I want to learn what I like. I want to spend more time with the Creator than content creators. I want to look around and feel inspired right here instead of over there. I know who I am spiritually and emotionally and mentally, but I want to learn who I am physically. What does it look like to take up space in Homer, Alaska in 2020? What do I find beautiful? How can I bring beauty into my home and my family?

I’m not sure when I’ll be back, and I’m not sure I’ll come back feeling entirely different, filled to the brim with fresh vision for my current season or the future. I hope I come back with a better sense of what I’ve now dubbed the essence of Rach.

1 Comment
2022

February 17, 2022

Everyone and their mother, especially their mother, should schedule a day to leave early from work, get a facial, and climb into bed hours before bedtime while it’s raining outside. Everyone.

2 Comments
2022

February 16, 2022

There is I stayed up too late tired, and there is maybe I’m depressed tired, and then there is I am doing-a-great-work tired. I find it helpful to know the difference.

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2022

February 15, 2022

For nearly two years now, we’ve celebrated Taco Salad Tuesdays in the Kincaid house. There is food and drink and music and dance and if we’re lucky, an evening without arguing. Tonight featured a margarita on the couch, our beloved Hornets basketball, and a special guest… Daddy’s macro lens and a portrait session. Tuesday nights are special nights.

2 Comments
2022

February 14, 2022

10/10 recommend switching sides of the bed with your partner after years and years. That, and watching My Big Fat Greek Wedding with your kids with a beautiful charcuterie. Happy Valentine’s Day.

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2022

February 13, 2022

On a whim in middle school, I had second holes pierced into my ears during a choir trip in… this whim required a teacher to pose as my mother, after I phoned my real mother and pressured her into it.

On a similar yet different whim, I recently attempted to put earrings through those holes. Interestingly enough, the earrings went in with minimal pain, after decades without attention. I consider it one of the greatest accomplishments of my 30’s to date.

Here’s to the whim.

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