working from rest; not there yet

Instead of resting from work, what if we worked from a rested place?

I think I first heard the phrase from Jessi, during an Influence Network team meeting a few months back. She & Hayley regularly encourage us to take time for ourselves and our families. All of us will have had a new baby by the end of the this year, so it’s been a crazy one for the entire core team. The idea of working from a place of rest seemed delicious to me. I desperately wanted to make real the idea that God does not honor busy. He is not impressed with my almost-constant state of moving and working and doing. He tells it to me straight, in His word, I will fight for you. Just be still.

I’ve digested and processed this concept over and over recently, going as far as to share it with my women’s group at church this week. And just when I sounded super spiritual, looking these women in the eyes and telling them that God doesn’t honor our busy, I started to lose it. I smiled with tears in my eyes and whispered, “Bullsh*t.”

I can’t seem to make my heart and mind and body connect on this. God doesn’t need me to work so hard. He doesn’t want me striving. He wants me resting. That is when I’m most pliable, most vulnerable, most open to His love and His voice and His will. So why do I continue to work so hard? Why do I continue to strive? Why do I refuse to rest?

I don’t have a happy ending here, folks. I’m not there yet. I’m at step one – admitting there’s a problem. But I think God’s grace tells me that’s enough for right now.